An Oshawa woman feels like a Grinch stole her Christmas, after decorations in memory of her son were taken down from his memorial tree in Oshawa.
“I cannot leave my tree sitting there like that,” says Karen Ihlenfeld, who has been decorating the tree for nearly 10 years with her family.
“You have no idea how it eats at me,” she says. “I feel like I’m neglecting it.”
It’s painful for her to think about. Her son, Ralph Ihlenfeld, passed away in 2010, and this tree allowed her to have that one spot to remember him.
The big oak tree was purchased when her son’s friends raised the money to purchase the tree as a memorial.
“It brings such a good feeling that I’m doing something for my son still,” she says.
The decorations were taken down after a complaint was launched with the City of Oshawa. When Ihlenfeld got the news her decorations were gone — it was heartbreaking for her to hear.
“It was almost like a I got punched in the stomach, it was so ridiculous. Who is it hurting?”
The family decorated the tree over the past several years for Halloween, Valentine’s Day, Christmas and other holidays they missed him for. It was so popular for his friends and strangers that she posted each set of decorations on social media.
“Every time a photo pops up, it makes them think about him again,” she says.
“That’s all I want. I don’t want my son’s memory to die.”
Now all that’s left on the tree is one ornament — a lone snowflake. Neighbours are now confused why they were taken down, when just a handful of people may have complained.
“I was really disappointed,” says Todd Powless, who has lived in the neighbourhood for more than 20 years.
“I’ve watched the whole family come and decorate the tree and it’s nice and tasteful. I don’t understand why they would do this.”
It’s been a problem for several people, though, according to the City of Oshawa. Director of Operations Mike Saulnier tells Global News there were several complaints made.
“We had a number of complaints about the tree,” says Saulnier. When asked by a Global News reporter for the reasons behind those complaints, Saulnier said, “Essentially they were saying the tree was decorated and they couldn’t understand why.”
Saulnier says he understands this is a sensitive issue, but said it’s against the rules to decorate memorial trees in the city and they need to be consistent with enforcement.
“We can certainly empathize and certainly understand what she is going through,” he says. “But when you have more than 300 trees in the city, this is really challenging for us.”
Ihlenfeld still says she wants the city to reconsider so her son’s memory can live on.
“I just wish they would let me decorate my tree,” she said. “It’s such a harmless thing, really.”
And neighbours like Anita Day agree.
“I think that everyone in the neighbourhood, except the person who complained, would really like that woman to be able to put her things back up for her son,” Day said.
Comments