Parents can help ease back-to-school anxiety

WINNIPEG – Most children head back to school with a mix of trepidation and excitement, but for some the anxiety is worse.

For those who suffer a lot of stress in the leadup to school, the next few days are important, says John Walker, a clinical psychologist at the St. Boniface Hospital anxiety disorders clinic.

“About one in 10 children at every grade level are quite anxious about some factor, some about going to school, some about other things,” Walker told the Morning News on Friday.

“If your child is anxious, this five or six days before school starts is a great time to prepare.”

The Winnipeg and Manitoba branches of the Canadian Mental Health Association in collaboration with the Manitoba Psychological Society and the Manitoba Schizophrenia Society have compiled a list of 10 ways parents can decrease the stress of going back to school:

1. Start the routine before the child returns to school (for example, regular times to go to bed and wake up).
2. If possible, visit the school and meet the teacher before the school year begins.
3. Talk to your child about how your child is feeling and validate your child’s emotions. For example, if your child is afraid, say, “It’s OK to be afraid. Lots of kids are afraid.”
4. Identify exciting and positive things about returning to school (such as seeing old friends and learning new things).
5. Send your child to school with a little piece of you. A toy or a note from mom or dad in a child’s backpack or lunch kit could help, Walker said.
6. Make a scrapbook about school and add fun things to it at the end of the day (a photo of the first day or something made at school).
7. Have something special for your child at the end of the school day (a favourite food for dinner or a trip to the park).
8. Give your child choices about small things (such as what to wear or what to eat for lunch).
9. Stay clam.
10. Remember that anxiety goes down naturally and your child’s anxiety will reduce as well.

If a child is still anxious after a couple of weeks or the anxiety level increases, talk to the school to see if they can offer help and support.

And when you get there on the first day, that “Stay calm” advice is particularly important.

“It’s really important for parents to be determined or firm,” Walker said. “If your child is upset, you can be reassured that almost always he’ll be settled in five or 10 minutes, so not making the goodbye too long is a big step that can help.”