WATCH: Barbara Coloroso shares the keys to raising a well-rounded child
MONTREAL — According to renowned parenting expert, Barbara Coloroso, it’s the number one question parents ask.
“How do I raise my kid to be that caring, compassionate, resilient human being?”
For Coloroso, the answer is simple: “Anything you can do to model caring deeply about other human beings and sharing generously of the gifts, the items we may have, and helping willingly.”
She said parents must “walk the talk,” and then give children the opportunity to do the same.
Coloroso said she believes praise is a bad idea.
“Don’t abundantly praise children when they do the right thing, because praise interferes with ethical behaviour.”
Instead, thank a child for sharing that toy with their baby brother; thank them when they act responsibly.
Eventually, she said, children will take those habits of caring and compassion with them throughout life.
Coloroso said that helping children to be compassionate starts at a young age. It’s as simple as “red pyjama, blue pyjama.”
For example, her children didn’t get to decide when they went to bed, but they were allowed to chose which pyjamas they would wear.
She said there’s a lot of power in letting kids make choices and decisions when they’re young and parents should be thinking of “age appropriate, ability appropriate choices and decisions. ”
Coloroso suggested parents need to listen to themselves more, because when mothers and fathers “nag, nag, nag, kids start to tune this out.”
“Say ‘No’ very rarely, and use the ‘Yes, later, convince me, give me a minute,’ alternative instead.”
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