Jill’s House: My problem with princesses

WINNIPEG — I was reading my daughter a bedtime story and of course she had picked a princess book, Sleeping Beauty, to read.

I have a beef with princesses, particularly the “old school” ones and the “old school” stories, which I will get to in a minute.

But as I read the story, and other princess stories, to my daughter and change a few words here and there to avoid using the word “kill,” “destroy” and other inappropriate words, she says to me “she is so beautiful.”

I said, “why is she beautiful?”

“Because she has a good heart and a good imagination.”

Yes! She must actually listen to me!

It was a proud mommy moment because here is my peeve with princesses – I don’t want my daughter to believe that being beautiful is only about how you look or that you have to be saved by a man or prince, or that you can actually live “happily ever after” exactly like they make it out in the story.  Plus, using the above words for pre-school children is too dramatic and downright inappropriate, if you ask me.

When Camryn and I talk about why these princesses are pretty or why she likes them, I tell her that I like them because they are smart and strong.  I tell her I think the princess is beautiful because she is kind, caring and thoughtful.

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So when Camryn tells me the princess is beautiful for another reason other than the sparkly dress she is wearing, it makes me happy.

At one point when she was younger, I really tried to shield her from the whole princess phenomenon for the reasons above and more.  However, I quickly realized that was silly and really, next to impossible, especially as she got older and would be exposed to things through friends and school.  So the only thing I could do was help her see the princesses for more than what they are in their beautiful ball gowns.

Even now, she loves to pretend to be Elsa from Frozen and dressed up as Elsa for Halloween, but when she asks me, as Elsa, if she is beautiful, I say yes, but Camryn is just as gorgeous.  And I tell her why. I tell her because she is funny, thoughtful, loves to share, is caring and playful.

Through these books, other types of stories, movies and through any sort of media, I try to use it as an opportunity to show my child to use her imagination, to think about people in terms of more than what you see on the outside and that you can’t always believe everything you read and see on the television.

Basically, that you can’t judge a book by it’s cover.