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‘Face it, you suck:’ Calgary golf association recruiting ‘mediocre’ players

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WATCH: Are you bad at golf? Or do you know someone who thinks they're better at the game than they actually are? Well the Mediocre Golf Association might be the club for you. As Lisa Macgregor reports, it's a league that embraces missing the putt or landing in the sand trap – May 23, 2017

The Mediocre Golf Association‘s slogan on their card is blunt: “Face it, you suck (so join our group!).”

Are you bad at golf? Or do you know someone who thinks they’re better at the game than they actually are?

Well, maybe it’s time to accept that you’re not the next Tiger Woods and become a member of Calgary’s MGA (Mediocre Golf Association) Tour.

It’s a place for triple-bogey golfers to feel at home and embrace missing their putts, or landing in the rough.

“There’s a lot of vanity golfers in Calgary, where they say their handicap is a lot better than it is — once they find us, they feel right at home and show their true colours when it comes to golfing,” says Al Renner, leader of the Calgary MGA chapter.

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“You can’t be a good golfer, because otherwise we’re going to penalize you.”

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New MGA member Maureen Clyne says she was pleased to finally find a club where she met the so-called “requirements.”

“I thought, that’s me… I’ve played a couple of tournaments already — very badly I might add — which is par for the course I think,” Clyne said.

The best part on the green — or off of it if you shank the ball — is that there’s no more pressure to keep up with the pro in your group.

“They’re eagle-ing every hole. They just want you to ‘get moving, get moving.’ That’s not the group you’re with [here] — you’re just with a bunch of guys that want to hit the ball and have fun,” said Craig Forsythe, MGA member and the group’s 2016 winter champion. “I’m good at putting; I’m bad at pretty much everything else. Swinging the club is pretty much [what] I’m bad at.”

“Nobody really cares if they’re the best golfer in the world or the worst golfer. They’re just out there to have a good time,” Renner said.

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This fun on the fairway isn’t just on Calgary courses. There are mediocre members around the world playing on the MGA tour. MGA began in San Francisco in 2006 and now there are 72 chapters around the world, from Columbia all the way to Australia, in case members want to get in a round or two in with an well-matched partner during their travels.

There’s also an MGA World Championship taking place in Vegas on November 10 and 11.

It’s where the best “kind of all right” golfers will compete against other chapters around the world. A member can qualify after winning an event or appearing in three events during the season.

But what if you get better at golf in the process? That’s not something current members of the MGA are too worried about.

“I’ll never be that good at golf. I’ll have to start my own group then — the ‘less mediocre’ golf group,” Clyne laughed.

 

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