TORONTO – Sex therapist Dr. Ruth Westheimer has come under fire for telling women if they “don’t want to have sex with a man, they should not be naked in bed with him.”
The 86-year-old made the comment on Twitter following an interview on National Public Radio Monday, where the advice columnist weighed in on the debate over sexual assaults on U.S. college campuses.
Speaking on the Diane Rehm Show, Westheimer told Rehm that once two people are naked and “aroused” there’s no turning back.
“I know it’s controversial, but for your program, I’m going to stand up and be counted and, like I do in the book, be very honest,” the doctor said. “I am very worried about college campuses saying that a woman and a man or two men or two women, but I talk right now about woman and man, can be in bed together, Diane, and at one time, naked, and at one time, he or she — most of the time they think she can say, I changed my mind. No such thing is possible.
“In the Talmud, in the Jewish tradition, it says when that part of the male anatomy is aroused, when there is an erection, the brain flies out of the head. And we have to take that very seriously. So I don’t agree with that.”
Westheimer, who turns 87 Thursday, was on the call-in show to promote her new book The Doctor Is In: Dr Ruth on Love, Life, Joie de Vivre.
Later in the talk show, Rehm gave the doctor a chance to clarify her comments.
“What you’re saying is it’s already gone too far,” Rehm said.
“Yes. What I’m saying, Diane, you’re putting it very well,” the doctor replied. ” When he’s very aroused, strong erection, when she’s very aroused, either he or she cannot change their mind,” Westheimer later added.
Many on social media accused the sex therapist of victim blaming.
Westheimer took to Twitter to defend her remarks by saying she’s “100 per cent against rape,” but:
Men also chimed in on Twitter calling Westheimer’s remarks “revolting.”
Toronto-based sexologist and author of The New Sex Bible Jessica O’Reilly echoed the comments.
“Your sex drive is both powerful and natural, but it is not uncontrollable,” O’Reilly said in an email to Global News. “We may frame male sexuality as beastly and unmanageable, but this one-dimensional stereotype is not rooted in science.”
O’Reilly called Westheimer’s claim that — once naked it bed, there’s no turning back– “simply inaccurate.”
“Any married couple can attest to the fact that sleeping naked together is not necessarily an indication of an interest in sex,” O’Reilly said.
“Comments like Dr. Ruth’s serve to further blur the lines instead of making consent a part of sex play,” O’Reilly said.
Comments