With just a pen and paper, Whitby, Ont., mom Jody Swain found a way to turn chores into an incentivizing game, in hopes of encouraging her kids to help out more around the house — without the motherly nagging that many of us are familiar with.
Now, fast forward a few years — there’s an app for it. The Hire and Fire Your Kids app is now a household staple.
The way it works is simple: parents post chores and expectations to the app, and if they’re done right, kids get paid.
These “jobs” have the option to pay out kids. So whether you want to reward your kids with cash, points or playtime, they can earn “rewards” based on the jobs they apply to.
“As they earn this money, they can cash it out, and there’s a slew of gift cards they can choose from, or they can cash out of the system and it can go to a chequing or savings account,” said Swain. “And the expectation aspect is for jobs that shouldn’t require a reward, such as keeping rooms clean”
“As a parent, you would see on your home page the ‘take a photo’ option, ‘warning option’ and ‘recognition.’ The goal is, when things are driving you crazy, you take a picture, and send off that warning X. If the job isn’t done right, or at all, kids could potentially see consequences.”
Swain says the app allows kids to decide their consequences, which puts the onus on them.
Psychotherapist Dr. Deborah Epstein says it’s all about the three Cs — communication, consistency and connection — when it comes to parenting effectively, and the app is a great tool to back that up.
“We are all creatures of habit, so it’s important to have consistency,” she said. “It’s really difficult for kids when you are not.”
“For some kids, rewards work really well. It’s really incentivizing. But for some, it doesn’t work at all.”
The catch is that both parents and kids can get fired.
“They get these warning Xs, and if they hit a certain amount of Xs in the payment period, they get fired and don’t get paid,” said Swain. And, if parents don’t complete their tasks, they can also get fired.
Kids, just like employees, appreciate recognition for doing good work. The app sends off a reminder every 48 hours if you haven’t recognized parents or siblings, or vice versa.
However, the rules are up to each family. The $8 app is completely customizable, from rewards to chores to expectations.
And the results, Swain says, have been a complete game-changer.
“I wouldn’t even have to say something sometimes,” said Swain. “I remember coming home, and there would be shoes at the front door … and I would just be like, ‘Oh … somebody’s going to get an X’ … and they would run to go and clean it.”
She adds that that behaviour eventually became normal in her home. And the best part is that it brought her nagging to a minimum.
“To be able to just take a picture and send it off is powerful for children who love their devices,” she said. “And as a parent, you just don’t have to say anything. You take a picture and the point is sent across.”
Swain says it helps make the face time you have with your family better, and all the chores, expectations and nagging get directed to the app.
Epstein says a smooth-running household typically follows a 90-to-10 ratio, meaning 90 per cent of the time is spent connecting with your kids, and the other 10 per cent is focusing on discipline and correction. Epstein says the number one goal for parents should always be striving for connection. That doesn’t necessarily mean being best friends, but it means spending time together and having meaningful conversations.
“Trying to put those things into place, all those corrective things, becomes nagging and can become a fight if you don’t have a connection,” said Epstein.
“The app is a phenomenal tool in terms of strategizing and backing up those conversations, but not in lieu,” she says. “I think those conversations really need to happen, not instead of.”
On the app website, the original paper version of the game is still available for download. But the app is available for download on various app stores. There’s also a web version for non-smartphone users.
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