HALIFAX – Emily Coolen chops up a cucumber as a snack now, but that wasn’t always the case for the former anorexic.
Coolen, 19, first started paying attention to what she was eating when she was about 10 years old.
“I compared my food to what everyone else had and it always had to be smaller and smaller,” she said.
“My self-worth became very tied in with how much I ate.”
Coolen was very conscientious of her diet but did not realize there was anything wrong until an incident in Grade 9.
She recalls eating a crumpet at school when she suddenly panicked about how many calories the crumpet was. Coolen had thrown the packaging away but soon found herself combing through the garbage looking for it.
“I tried to find the package and I thought, ‘OK, this isn’t normal I don’t think’,” she said.
But she still kept close tabs on what she did and did not eat.
“The list of what I would allow myself got smaller and smaller, and the list of what I wouldn’t allow myself got larger and larger,” she said.
“I would envy people who were at the mall eating a pretzel. It would make me freeze in my shoes, the thought of eating it.”
Coolen admits that she kept her feelings to herself because she did not want to seem different from her friends. But things eventually went from bad to worse when her weight dropped drastically the summer between grade 9 and 10.
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Coolen ended up being hospitalized. The 5’4″ teen weighed only 90 pounds at that point. At the time, she still did not understand why she was receiving treatment.
“The whole time I’m thinking, ‘How is this happening? I’m not thin’,” she said.
Dr. David Pilon, the program leader with Specialty Mental Health Services for Capital Health, said anorexia affects 0.5 to one per cent of young women.
“An individual experiences a loss of weight such that their body weight is considerably lower than where it should be,” he said.
“Individuals who are very thin or even emaciated may look at their body and truly see a body that is much larger than what it may be.”
In Coolen’s case, she underwent a treatment program at the IWK Health Centre. But the experience dramatically affected her family life. Her mother, Anne Marie, became involved in the cause and is now spearheading efforts in Nova Scotia to establish a provincial presence for a national foundation for eating disorders.
According to notes from the foundation, the organization would fundraise, provide financial assistance to clinical and peer support programs, lead nationwide prevention programs and reach out to government, the business sector and other national organizations.
“There isn’t enough research being done. There isn’t enough clinical support. There isn’t enough peer support,” Anne Marie said.
Anne Marie said that she’s reaching out to parents, support groups and people with corporate and fundraising backgrounds to get involved with the group.
But mostly, as a mother, she is relieved changes are on the horizon.
“I’m really heartened by this. I felt very alone when we were going through the process.”
Pilon said establishing a national presence will create positive change.
“I think there is a considerable misconception about eating disorders, what causes them and about how serious they are.”
“When there are national foundations associated with health problems, they tend to do a nice job to raise awareness about the concern related to the health problem in question. They also tend to get involved with fundraising initiatives that can lead to additional resources,” he said.
Meanwhile, Coolen is on the path to recovery. She relapsed a few times and said she’s been through ups and downs, but she is hopeful and optimistic about her future as well as the change a national foundation for eating disorders could bring.
“I’m working a little bit on it, taking it day by day,” she said. “This foundation is really going to make a difference in terms of education. The more information the public has about something like this, the less stigma there will be.”
According to spokesperson Wendy Preskow, the foundation, which started as an idea from members of the National Initiative for Eating Disorders, does not yet have a name and is not yet registered as a charitable organization.
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