For Jennifer Cartwright, the pain of her rheumatoid arthritis can sometimes be excruciating.
“Your joints are swollen and sensitive,” she said.
But with the support of her husband Dave, the 34-year-old Kelowna woman has been able to cope since her diagnosis two years ago.
“His emotional support keeps me going every day, knowing that I can get through the rest of my years living with this disease,” she said with a smile as she looked over to her husband.
Now new research out of UBC Okanagan shows how far a little love and emotional support can go.
Past research has shown that social support is important to health outcomes but little was known about what causes a person to feel supported.
The study shows that love and respect between married couples where one has rheumatoid arthritis stands out above the rest in making the person with the arthritis feel supported, which helps them cope with the pain.
“You feel supported and therefore there are all sorts of positive benefits including decreased pain, decreased functional disability and decreased depression,” said Tom Beggs, a graduate student in health psychology at UBCO, who conducted the research.
Other types of support include tangible things like helping with tasks, such as carrying groceries and offering rides, informational support in the form of advice and comforting the arthritis sufferer.
But Beggs believes that they may not be as important.
“You give them a ride to the store but maybe it reminds them they can’t drive themselves anymore. If I give you a piece of advice maybe that advice is seen as controlling, maybe that advice is seen as condescending,” Beggs said.
“Other types of support can be seen as controlling. They are sometimes ambiguous whereas you give someone love, you give somebody respect, it’s a different thing.”
And in the end, it’s really quite simple.
“It’s easy to say that but what exactly does that entail? Within a relationship you know. You know what your partner likes and you know what you can do for your partner to make them feel special and make them feel respected and make them feel loved,” Beggs said.
Dave Cartwright says that he sees that in his relationship with Jennifer.
“Jenn can get down sometimes,” he said. “It’s a real drag having this disease and sometimes often listening helps but as well, knowing when to make her laugh or take her out and have a good time. It has brought us closer together.”
“You feel a little defeated sometimes so having someone there to support you and keeping the end goal in mind that I can still live a healthy life,” said Jennifer.
The research was based off data from Caucasian women suffering from rheumatoid arthritis. Beggs says more research needs to be done to see whether the same findings apply to men, to different ethnicities and different diseases.
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