WARNING: This story contains explicit language.
Shia LaBeouf has decided to open up about learning mistakes from his arrest in Savannah, Ga., for public drunkenness and disorderly conduct nearly a year ago.
“What went on in Georgia was mortifying,” LaBeouf said in his cover story for Esquire’s April issue. “White privilege and desperation and disaster. … It came from a place of self-centered delusion. … It was me trying to absolve myself of guilt for getting arrested.
He added: “I f**ked up.”
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“I’m a buffoon,” LaBeouf he told Esquire. “My public outbursts are failures. They’re not strategic. They’re a struggling motherf**ker showing his a** in front of the world.”
He was in Savannah in July 2017 to film his upcoming movie, The Peanut Butter Falcon, when the 31-year-old actor was arrested. LaBeouf was taken into police custody after resisting arrest and going on a racist, profanity-filled rant.
Footage of the incident was released online, showing him calling police officers “b*tch” and “wh*re.” He said one of the officers “especially” was going to hell, LaBeouf said, “because he’s a black man.”
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LaBeouf went on to say that he’s a “tax-paying American” and “I have rights.” LaBeouf also said, “I’m an American. You’ve got me in my hotel, arresting me in my hotel, for doing what, sir? You really got these cuffs on me heavy, bro.”
He also made reference to U.S. President Donald Trump. “You got a president that don’t give a sh** about you, and you’re stuck in a police force that don’t give a f*** about you, so you want to arrest white people who give a f***, who ask for cigarettes?” LaBeouf told one of the officers.
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He continued: “I came up trying to be nice you stupid b****. I came up to you asking for a cigarette, you dumb f***. Why would I ask for a cigarette if I was racist? You stupid b****. I was asking for a cigarette, you said ‘no.’ I said, ‘word.’ And then you arrested me, you dumb f***.”
“They got cameras everywhere you dummy. I got more millionaire lawyers than you know what to do with, you stupid b****. I’m from it, you dummy!” LaBeouf said.
He was charged with public drunkenness (which was later dropped) and disorderly conduct. He issued an apology after the footage of the incident was released saying, “I am deeply ashamed of my behaviour and make no excuses for it.” In October, the actor pleaded guilty to a misdemeanor charge of obstruction and was placed on a year’s probation.
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The actor revealed to Esquire that he had spoken with his The Peanut Butter Falcon director, Zack Gottsagen, after getting out of jail.
“You’re already famous. This is my chance. And you’re ruining it,” LaBeouf recalled Gottsagen saying to him.
“To hear him say that he was disappointed in me probably changed the course of my life. Because I was still fighting. I was still on my ‘Look how fast they released the videos! They don’t release these!’ Just on my defense-mechanism-fear garbage. And you can’t do that to him,” LaBeouf said. “He keeps it one thousand with you, and that sh*t doesn’t even make sense to him. Zack can’t not shoot straight, and bless him for it, because in that moment, I needed a straight shooter who I couldn’t argue with.”
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The former Even Stevens star now says he’s trying to “look at my failures in the face,” “take ownership of my sh*t and clean up my side of the street a bit before I can go out there and work again.”
“I’ve been falling forward for a long time. Most of my life,” he said. “The truth is, in my desperation, I lost the plot.”