The man who hosted a house party where the worst mass killing in Calgary’s history took place is detailing what happened that night for the first time.
A column by Brendan McCabe was published by Vice News on Thursday, titled “My friend killed five people in my home but I won’t call him a monster.”
Lawrence Hong, Josh Hunter, Katie Perras, Zachariah Rathwell and Jordan Segura were stabbed to death by Matthew de Grood.
In the column, McCabe shared his grief over the loss of his five friends, and described his lifelong connection with de Grood, whom he said was his first and closest childhood friend.
De Grood was found not criminally responsible for the killings. He remains in a secure psychiatric facility in Calgary.
McCabe expressed frustration over society’s lack of understanding of mental health issues.
“Stigma is part of what stopped Matt and those close to him from identifying his illness in the first place: nobody wants to believe that their loved one is unwell. The violent and tragic events that occurred, partly due to this, have now reinforced these stigmas, making it more difficult for others battling with mental illnesses to seek help,” McCabe wrote.
Forensic psychologist Dr. Patrick Baillie told Global News he believes an article like McCabe’s can help promote dialogue over mental health.
“To have an individual who is willing to step forward and say, ‘On the one hand I was a victim of all of this – but on the other hand I see that Matthew was also a victim of all of this,’ that’s a dialogue that we need to continue to have.”
Baillie believes McCabe’s perspective can help society look at what resources are in place and to consider whether we are aware of warning signs in ourselves and in the people around us.
McCabe is candid about the guilt he feels over failing to recognize the symptoms in his friend, and is hoping the tragedy can help spark some progressive change.
“It frustrates me to no end that people refuse to see what is clearly to blame here, and continue to perpetuate the conditions that led to this tragedy — and will lead to others if we do not address them.”
Where to get help
If you or someone you know is in crisis and needs help, resources are available. In case of an emergency, please call 911 for immediate help.
The Canadian Association for Suicide Prevention, Depression Hurts and Kids Help Phone 1-800-668-6868 all offer ways of getting help if you, or someone you know, may be suffering from mental health issues
With files from Nancy Hixt