Why parents need to contact a pediatrician when going through divorce

Between the lawyers and splitting up your lives, divorce can get pretty messy for a couple. But what about the kids? New guidelines out of the American Academy of Pediatrics (AAP) urge parents to reach out to pediatricians who can help children through this tumultuous period.

More than one million American kids are affected by their parents’ separation, according to the report released Monday. Recent Statistics Canada data reports there were 71,269 divorces in 2005.

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The breakup affects kids psychologically more than parents know – even if they weren’t married, the pediatricians say. While you’re working with divorce attorneys and hiring movers, seek advice from a pediatrician, they advise.

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“The pediatrician can help parents understand their children’s reactions to divorce or separation. Those reactions will vary, depending on age and stage of development,” Dr. Carol Weitzman, one of the lead authors, said in a statement.

“Parents should be encouraged to answer their children’s questions honestly, and allow them to express their own feelings,” she said.

Tweet This Click to share quote on Twitter: "The pediatrician can help parents understand their children's reactions to divorce or separation. Those reactions will vary, depending on age and stage of development," Dr. Carol Weitzman, one of the lead authors, said in a statement.</p><p>"Parents should be encouraged to answer their children's questions honestly, and allow them to express their own feelings," she said.

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The AAP report said parents should anticipate behaviour changes in their kids within the first year of separating. These concerns should resolve in about two to three years.

But the report warns a child’s “sense of loss” lingers for years after, especially around the holidays, on birthdays or special events, such as graduation.

Reach out to a pediatrician for professional help when changes crop up, such as when custody arrangements are altered, parents start dating again or when stepfamilies are brought into the picture, the report said.

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Kids’ daily routines, such as going to school and extracurricular activities, need to stay the same as much as possible, the report warns.

Kids also need to know that they did not cause the divorce.

Read the full guidelines.

carmen.chai@globalnews.ca
Follow @Carmen_Chai