HALIFAX – A former client of Alice Housing is speaking out publicly to share her story of escape from domestic violence.
Darla, whose last name is being withheld for her safety, was living a nightmare seven years ago because of an abusive partner.
Darla said it was hard to leave her partner but one incident changed everything.
“In the end, he stabbed me. The neighbours called police. He was arrested and I was taken to a safe house,” she said.
Police told Darla that it was not safe for her to remain where she was, so the then 38-year-old woman called Alice Housing, a second stage housing program for women and children fleeing domestic violence.
Darla turned her life upside down to escape her situation.
“I had to leave my job, all my personal belongings. That was a big issue for me, at 38, having to start over,” she said, as tears welled up in her eyes.
“I didn’t want to live being in that situation. It was for self-preservation.”
Statistics from Alice Housing show that every six days in Canada, a woman is killed by her partner.
Lori Morgan, a counselor at Alice Housing, said that when women arrive on their doorsteps, they often have low self-esteem, difficulty having boundaries with new friends or partners, sadness, grief and guilt.
“We are a necessity,” Morgan said. “Each women and child that comes here, counseling is mandatory.”
“It was a big relief that I had some safe place to come that could come support me, allow me to grow and make changes in my life that were positive,” Darla said.
Darla met weekly with a women’s counselor, got a new job and moved into a new apartment owned by Alice Housing.
“It was the first time I ever lived alone. I was 38 so it took a little bit of an adjustment for me to be in my own space even though I was safe.”
Slowly she began to adjust to her new life.
“This was the best choice I made: to go, end that cycle and start over. It taught me to trust myself and to love myself, to have the right instincts on what love is and what love isn’t,” she said.
Now, Darla has a good job and is actively volunteering in the community. She also has the confidence knowing she made the right decision and has advice for women who are in the same situation she was.
“There is a better life and as scary as it is to make that choice, it’s the right one for you and for your children. There’s happiness on the other side,” she said.
The change within Darla is something Morgan often sees in Alice Housing clients.
“You see growth. It’s so beautiful to watch the women and children evolve and grow and develop to become themselves,” Morgan said.
Alice Housing recently celebrated its 30th anniversary. In that time, it has helped more than 1,000 families escape the cycle of domestic violence.
Morgan said that there is often more demand for Alice Housing programs after Christmas and at the end of the school year.
The counselor said that she thinks women try to hold out until the holidays are over or until their kids are done school.
“I think it’s based on the protection of the child,” she said.
“To leave takes courage and we’re here when you’re ready.”
Statistics from Alice Housing show more than 3,000 women and 2,500 children live in emergency shelters every day to escape domestic violence.
The organization accepts women from around Nova Scotia and has even seen some clients from the United States.
If you are in a situation involving domestic violence and need help, call Alice Housing at 902-466-8459.
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