WATCH: In the final installment of our special series “Life After Loss” we speak with a father confronted with a terminal illness and how facing the disease head on, has meant planning for a future that may not exist. Tracy Nagai reports.
CALGARY – Brett Bishop was diagnosed with cancer at 57, completely unaware he was ill.
“I came home from work and was helping my brother-in-law work on his vehicle,” said Bishop. “I went in to get a drink and I took it and I went to swallow and it wouldn’t go down. I couldn’t get a drop to go down.”
Bishop has spent the last three years fighting the esophageal cancer, with treatments including surgery, chemotherapy and radiation. After two years, the cancer spread. Bishop says he’s not sure how much time he has left.
“I decided to fight it because life is too good to give up on. So I fight it with everything I got. And I’m glad I did.”
Bishop meets with others weekly at Calgary’s Sage Centre. It’s a way for him to connect with people who understand his situation.
“A lot of times when you talk to people—even friends—they can’t relate to what you’re going through,” he said. “The minute I walked in the door, the warmth of everybody…regardless of how you felt…was like a comfort zone for everybody to be in.”
Bishop’s brother says he attends the meetings to offer support.
“Help, listen, be there…To say I can feel your pain? You can’t. You have to go through it,” said Reb Bishop.
And both brothers have dealt with cancer before.
“We lost both our parents to cancer and all of a sudden to find out, it’s back…” said Reb.
The Sage Centre focuses on providing people with what’s called a “good death.”
“I think the thing that really feeds my soul is when you can help somebody to die well, and you can help their family to go on with life,” said Sage’s manager of counseling services Elaine Munce.
She says one way is to talk about the final moments of your loved one and how they want the end to play out.
“What do I want it to look like at the end? Who do I want to be around me? Who do I want to be with? Do I want to die at home? Do I want to die at a hospice? Then, when they’ve got those things figured out, they can come back to the present.”
Bishop isn’t only focused on the present; he’s also planning future trips with his family.
“Just go for it,” he said. “You’re still the same person. You just have extra baggage, let’s call it.”
Comments