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Jill’s House: ‘So you know what hormones? You can take a hike’

While at a house party in April put on by a fellow curler, Kaitlyn from my team and myself got talking briefly to the host’s son and his 20-year-old friends.

“Are you here for the under 18’s?” one kid said.

“Under 18 what?!” said me and Kaitlyn.

” Under 18 hockey.”

“To watch? No.”

“No, to play” he said.

“You’re kidding right?”

“No, why?”

“Ok, I can understand how you think she is under 18,” I said as I pointed to Kaitlyn (it’s not the first time she’s been mistaken for a teenager!) “But take a really hard look at me and tell me how old you really think I am.”

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“Well obviously you are not under 17. So I will say 26?”

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“Seriously?” I said trying to read his face for how truthful he was being.

“Yeah seriously.”

“Well then you are my new best friend!”

He was actually quite stunned when I told him I was weeks shy of 41 and he proceeded to call me 2-6 for the rest of the night.

Although this was a 20-year-old’s assessment of age, I was quite happy about the compliment and Kaitlyn and I have joked about it many times since then.

I bring this up because while I feel mentally and physically young most days, maybe more so mid-thirties than mid-twenties (except after a grueling maximum number of games in a bonspiel), I have learned that after 40 every little ailment and change gets blamed on pesky hormones.

Oh, you have a headache? It’s hormones.

You were wide awake for an hour and a half in the middle of the night?  It’s hormones.

Hot flashes? Hormones.

Skin breakouts? Hormones.

You have a hangnail? It’s hormones(okay not really, but might as well be!)

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I don’t even need to visit my doctor anymore! I can self diagnose anything because the answer always seems to be, it’s your hormones!

I truly do forget sometimes that I am 41 but there is nothing that has made me realize I am aging than being told I feel certain ways because of hormones and changes in them.

I thought these fluctuations were only for moms with adult kids and grandmas! I am too young to be experiencing “the change” so I refuse to think this is the calm before the storm of that process.

So you know what hormones?  You can take a hike.  You interrupted my life when I was 15 and it went on for years then. I finally get you balanced out for a while and now you’re back with a vengeance. You’ve made me irritable, restless, and given me headaches and painful pimples so I have had just about enough of you! Oh yeah, and you also make me rant and rave like a crazy woman about how you have annoyingly interrupted my happy little life!

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