New Brunswick teen uses blog to tell story of coping with depression

A Sussex teen’s blog on coping with depression is garnering a lot of attention.

For years, 17-year-old Naomi Mahoney suffered in silence, telling no one she was suffering from feelings of self-hatred, had developed an eating disorder and had begun to harm herself.

She said at one point she couldn’t bring herself to even look in the mirror.

“I would just go and wash my hands and then leave because I just didn’t want to see myself,” she said. “I was always the picked-on kid, like I wasn’t all that skinny and I wasn’t all that pretty.”

Tweet This Click to share quote on Twitter: "I would just go and wash my hands and then leave because I just didn't want to see myself," she said. "I was always the picked-on kid, like I wasn't all that skinny and I wasn't all that pretty."

Overcome with self-loathing, Naomi said she fell into a deep depression in middle school and developed an eating disorder. She even showered with her clothes on so she wouldn’t have to look at her own body.

“It was disgusting to me. I actually just put a t-shirt on.”

She said she eventually started cutting and burning her own skin.

“I took the curling iron and put it on the hottest setting and held it there.”

Her mother, Patricia Doherty, said she saw signs her daughter was struggling with something, but could not get her to open up about her depression.

“I didn’t realize she was cutting until I went into her bedroom one day and I would see tools that she was using, and it was heartbreaking.”

Tweet This Click to share quote on Twitter: "I didn't realize she was cutting until I went into her bedroom one day and I would see tools that she was using, and it was heartbreaking."

She said tried to get her daughter help, but that Naomi would just lash out at her and even at her own peers.

“I thought that by being mean to others I was going to be popular. I was going to be the pretty girl that I hadn’t been for so long.” said Naomi. “I knew I needed help while I was doing it.”

Naomi said last fall, she finally found the courage to get help. She reached out to her guidance counselor at school for support and in January, she started a blog called “Empty Park Bench”. In it, her raw writings about dealing with depression are resonating with readers, with one post attracting more than 5,000 hits in a week.

“I am so incredibly proud of her. She is helping other people.” said Doherty.

Naomi said the blog is also helping her deal with her own depression. She said she hasn’t made herself sick nor cut or burned herself since last November. Through her blog, she is finding strength in the countless messages of support.